Like many people, I’ve been fascinated by sex and sexuality for about as long as I can remember. I recall talking about it with friends as a child, reading about it as a youth, and then desiring it as a teen. I began having sex in High School, and I was frustrated because I didn’t have access to honest, easy to understand, or helpful knowledge about sexuality (especially since I was raised Catholic and in abstinence only Texas education.)
When I moved to Austin to study English at UT, I finally found more people willing to talk about sex candidly in many mediums. There were sex educators around campus handing out condoms, and one of my classes had a Peer Mentor teach us about sexual health. I took an Educational Psychology course titled Human Sexuality, which was exciting and of course packed with students every week. I was thrilled that I could write a 5 page essay about sexual imagery in various poems as well as discuss the sexuality in my own poetry in workshops full of trusted peers and frank, nonjudgmental professors.
During my senior year, I got a job at a lingerie and sex store, and since then I’ve helped countless people pick out all kinds of sex related products. On my best days at the job I came home excited because I felt like I really made a difference in opening up conversation about sexuality, whether it was by helping a shy woman pick out her first vibrator, listening to a co-workers’ first experience with pegging, or by having a discussion about squirting with a couple shopping.
Still, I felt there was a huge gap between how people talked about sex either in a classroom or in a sex store and how they talk about it in everyday life. I felt I had to hide my job from certain people, and I’ve had negative reactions from some who I’ve told about it. Perhaps most frustrating, I found that sex didn’t come up very often in normal conversation, unless in a joking manner. I found myself wishing sexual discussion was more like it was in the sex shop or in a poetry classroom: open, honest, accepting, and full of information, stories, ideas, and fantasies.
So I started this blog, and I began reading other sex blogs. I’ve always talked to people about sex, but with this blog I hope to share and talk to even more people about it. My goal is to share my sexuality and to encourage others to think and talk more about their sexual experiences, desires, fears, and fantasies. We are after all sexual creatures.