Currently Browsing: Reviews
Aug 7, 2014
Lovehoney Sensual Glass Plug
I thought I’d have no problem getting the Lovehoney Sensual Glass Plug in–with 3 insertable inches, it’s shorter than other things I’ve put in my butt, and although its 5.75″ circumference is a step up from the 5.25″ of the Ryder1, an extra half an inch didn’t seem like a huge deal. Boy was I wrong.
The Sensual Glass Plug is easy enough to insert at first, with a smooth, tapered tip…until I get to the widest part. Since the plug doesn’t taper back down like a lot of others do, my butt won’t suck it in, and it just floats there like a buoy. If Jake is around, I ask “IS IT IN?” and he says “yea…pretty much!” encouragingly. Except pretty much means it isn’t actually in, and it bobs right back out with a simple squeeze of my PC muscles or a shift to grab more lube.
Every time I tried to push the plug in past that point, the glass jabbed at my ass painfully. Still, I persevered.
I had faith in the power of my butt.
Ryder, Romp, Sensual Glass Plug, Atomic Rose Plug, Bootie
I tried warming up with smaller plugs. I tried Sassy2. I tried silicone. I tried mixing Sassy and silicone. I breathed deeply. I was one with my hole. I pampered my clit as I whispered sweet nothings to my butt. I tried warming up with cunnilingus and g-spot stimulation, and yet, I still couldn’t get it in.
I was about ready to give up and accept my butt hole failure, when I decided to try one last time. And when I used Bootie, Romp, baby Jesus, and Ryder, and it still wouldn’t go in, I got the idea of trying something else glass in my butt to get it used to the hardness. I grabbed my Icicles No. 21, put a condom over it, and used it to thrust gently until I felt Ready For The Plug.
And then something miraculous happened…I did it! The pride I felt in my butt was overwhelming. This must be what motherhood feels like, I thought. I immediately texted at least 3 friends: IT’S IN!!!
I finally warmed up my butt enough that the widest point didn’t hurt, and my butt sucked up that plug like a glass of sweet lemonade. And once it was in, it stayed in securely and felt delicious upon removal, especially since I synchronized it with an Eros orgasm.
Still, I can’t wear the Sensual Glass Plug around like I would others since I’m afraid it will hurt to take out if I leave it in too long. I also can’t use it during partner sex or with dildos because its hard glass fills me up, and I can barely get a finger in my vag when it’s in much less a penis.
And since anal thrusting actually warms me up for the plug and not vice versa, I probably won’t use it much unless I decide I want to move on to conquering even larger butt toys. Who knows, maybe someday this plug will seem like a tiny bloop on my ass’s radar. But until then, it has limited use for me.
All the toys it took to get it in
The moral of the story here is that the Sensual Glass Plug is definitely not a beginner’s plug…and I’d hesitate to even call it an Intermediate plug. It doesn’t look that big, but because of its hardness and shape, it can be quite difficult to insert and can potentially cause a lot of pain.
But if you’re an Intermediate/Advanced anal player, the Lovehoney Sensual Glass plug is a great deal at only $30 for a high quality Pyrex plug, and since its base portion has some girth, it can be used to warm up the sphincter for larger toys. Since it’s glass it’s non-porous and hygienic, and you can use any type of lube with it. It also comes with a purple velvet drawstring storage bag.
Just beware– if your butt isn’t ready, the Sensual Glass Plug will quite literally be a pain in your ass.
*Thanks Lovehoney! UK readers, find the Sensual Glass Plug here!
Jul 31, 2014
Fun Factory B Balls
If you read my reviews because you like thinking about me using sex toys and want to get turned on, just stop now. Because this review isn’t going to be sexy1
Basically, the B Balls are like a laxative for my butthole. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.
If you read a lot of reviews you may remember Epiphora’s review of the Severin, in which she explains that the plug gives her the feeling of constantly having to poop. Well I get that same feeling using the B Balls… except they actually make me poop.
But first, let’s back track. What are the B Balls?
The B Balls are a cross between a butt plug and anal beads–they consist of two balls2 connected closely together, with a flared base. Inside the balls are weights that are supposed to jiggle around in your butt, similar to how Kegel balls move around inside of the vagina for subtle stimulation. They’re made of matte silicone and have ridges along the outside of each ball.
The B Balls are smaller than some of my other anal toys, and I can insert them fairly easily, but the ridges feel a little abrasive to me, even with plenty of lube. My butt definitely prefers materials like glass, wood, or smooth, seamless silicone.
Now for the (not so) fun part: wearing the B Balls. As soon as I put them in, I feel like I have to poop. Constantly. And often they actually make me poop. Sometimes I can’t keep them in for more than 5 minutes before I am taking them out and pooping…when I had no poop feeling before using them.
Ryder, B Balls, Romp, & Bootie
I do have a fast metabolism, but I’m not the Energizer bunny of poop, I swear. And I use plenty of other butt toys and this doesn’t happen. I know other people that have used the B Balls, and this doesn’t happen to them so maybe it’s just me, but something about the hardness of the balls and their shape and placement makes them the poop-whisperer to my butt.
When I’m sitting, the poop sensation is somewhat rectified3, but the balls still don’t really do anything for me. They’re not exciting to squeeze around, they just feel boring and mildly uncomfortable. As for the weights, they do feel kind of cool jiggling around in my butt when I move…but so do the Luna Beads, and they don’t make me feel like pooping.
Another thing that really bothers me about the B Balls is the ridges I mentioned earlier. Not only do they feel kind of irritating, they also collect lube, butt juices and…you guessed it, POOP. It makes them hard to clean, and it makes them retain butt smells like it’s their (night) job4.
I also tried inserting the B Balls vaginally before using them anally, but they’re not designed for that and felt awkward and uncomfortable. As for wearing the B Balls during partner sex or with dildos…I just can’t bring myself to do it. Feeling like I have to poop is about the least sexy sensation I can think of, so…no.
Fun Factory did come up with something new and potentially exciting: jiggle balls for butts. And to be fair, the B Balls are stimulating, but not in the way I want them to be. I know others who have enjoyed them, so they might work for you too, but all they do to me is make me poop. On the plus side, if I’m ever constipated…
If you do decide to get the B Balls, they’re available at SheVibe, Lovehoney US, & Lovehoney UK.
Thanks Fun Factory!
Jul 23, 2014
It’s no secret that I like power. Don’t get me wrong–I enjoy many types of vibrators and don’t always want jack-hammer strength, but when I’m feeling lazy, wands are perfect for no fuss quickies.
So I was really excited about trying out the Doxy Massager, a relatively new wand from the UK that’s touted as “the world’s most powerful mains operated wand massager,” with up to 9,000 RPM. The Doxy’s design is similar to the Magic Wand, with a 9.5″ body attached to a 3″ long PVC head that can move around a bit. Its vibration speeds are controlled with push buttons, and it has a ~9 ft. long cord.
So since I’m a Magic Wand lover, and they seem similar, how does the Doxy compare?
To start, the Doxy has a wider range of vibration. At its low speeds, it’s weaker than the Magic Wand, at its middle speeds it’s similar in strength to the low speed on the Magic Wand, and at its high speeds it’s similar to1 the Magic Wand’s high speed. If you’re measuring by RPM, the Doxy might technically be the most powerful wand in the world2…but that doesn’t mean it’s the best.
You know those rough roller coasters that are more painful than fun, the ones that thrash your neck around and leave you with an overpowering headache so you can’t even feel the dips and turns anymore? That’s how my clit feels when using the Doxy.
Though the Doxy is very powerful at its highest speeds, it’s not a good kind of power. The vibration is very buzzy, and my clit immediately starts to itch like crazy–it’s unpleasant and desensitizing.
At its middle speeds, the Doxy feels similar to the Magic Wand, but to me it still feels buzzier. The lowest 2 speeds of the Doxy are the deepest and most enjoyable, but they’re weaker than the Magic Wand. The pulse setting has potential, but I wish you could control the intensity of the pulse rather than just the speed3
When you turn on the Doxy, it doesn’t start at its lower power setting, as most vibes do, it starts near full power. I don’t like this design because I prefer to work my way up in vibration strength, and since I don’t like the higher settings, it means I have to turn it down every time I turn on the Doxy. Otherwise the Doxy is easy to use though.
Sound wise, the Doxy is very quiet at its low settings (much quieter than the Magic Wand), but when you turn it up, it sounds like an airplane taking off, and unless you want to close your eyes and imagine a mile high club fantasy, it’s distracting and not discreet.
As for cleaning, the Doxy’s head is made of medical grade PVC. I assumed it was porous, but the owner of Doxy has claimed it’s not. I want to look into this more before I make an assertion either way. It’s also obviously not waterproof since it’s a plug-in, so I clean mine by wiping it with a soapy rag, taking care not to get water on the rest of the wand.
The Doxy seems like it should be better than the Magic Wand. It has a wider range of speeds, a pulse setting, and higher potential RPM. But I don’t judge vibes based on their qualities on paper–my clit makes the ultimate decision. And apparently my clit is pickier than I thought, because although they’re similar in strength, my clit is fiercely loyal to the Magic Wand, and it turns its nose up at the Doxy.
So, will your clit/balls/perineum/penis/tentacles like the Doxy? Obviously I can’t say for sure. If you enjoy very intense, buzzy vibration, you might love the Doxy. If having a wide range of vibration and a pulse setting in a wand is really important to you, the Doxy might work.
But if you’re just looking for a strong no fuss wand, I’d recommend the Magic Wand over the Doxy–it’s similar (and in my opinion better), and it’s $75 cheaper. If you’re in the UK and the Hitachi isn’t an option, Lilly recommends the Smart Wand Large over the Doxy4 And if the Magic Wand/Doxy/Smart Wand seem like too much for you but you still want a wand, I’d recommend the Mystic Wand instead.
If you do decide on a Doxy and are in the US, use the coupon code DOXYUSA for £12.99 off of your order from Belle de Soir. For UK readers, the Doxy is on sale for £69.99, and there’s also a sale running right now that includes the Doxy, a glass toy, and lube for £89.99.
Thanks Belle de Soir!
Jul 8, 2014
I started reading Violet Blue’s The Ultimate Guide to Sexual Fantasy while on a bus to Houston. A college aged guy sat next to me and asked what I was reading, and when I flipped the book to show him the cover, his tone went from conversational small talk to genuine interest.
“So what’s that about?” he asked.
We chatted about it for a bit, and at one point I gave him the book, which he flipped through, checking out the chapter and section titles like “Fantasies for One (Masturbation, Just Do It)” “Fantasies for Two,” and “Role Play,” and he even stopped and started reading at “Threesomes, Foursomes, and Moresomes.” After a few minutes he returned the book to me, but it had definitely piqued his interest, as I think it would most people!
The Ultimate Guide to Fantasy is quite a claim, so you’re probably wondering, does it live up to its title? And what exactly does this book cover?
Basically, the book discusses how make your sexual fantasies like exploring dirty talk, erotic dancing, group sex, public sex, fetishes, s/m scenarios, and more come true. The book is meant for anyone–it has an easy to read, conversational tone, and it isn’t specific to gender, sexual orientation, or experience level.
Violet Blue doesn’t just give you tips and ideas (although those are aplenty), she provides the practical advice you need, like how to bring it up with a partner, how to plan ahead for the fantasy, how to find props, and how to make sure everything goes as smoothly (or as roughly, depending on your fantasy!) as possible. And at the end of every chapter, there’s a hot story related to the section by well-known erotica writer Alison Tyler to fuel your imagination.
In addition to covering a huge range of fantasies, Violet also covers various options for making that fantasy happen depending on your comfort level. If you and your partner are interested in adding a third to your sex life, for example, Violet offers many different ideas for how to make that come true, from using sex toys & porn in the background to create a “pretend” threesome, to finding someone to actually join your for a hot encounter, to exploring strip clubs, phone sex, call girls, and sex parties.
The Ultimate Guide to Sexual Fantasy is lengthy sex book (at 256 pages), and although you may want to read it cover to cover like I did, I think many people would best enjoy it by exploring a chapter or two at a time, based on what peaks your interest. Some of my favorites chapters were “Threesomes, Foursomes, & Moresomes,” “Strip Clubs, Phone Sex, and Call Girls–for Two,” and “Public Sex.” With all of the taboo that surrounds sex work (and all of the interest for that matter) I’m glad that Violet included it. I’m also glad she included a vital chapter on safer sex practices with protection options and charts with the risks involved in various sex acts.
In certain parts of the book I could tell that it was an updated version of the last edition (2004), like in the DIY porn section (no one uses VHS video cameras anymore, do they?) and in the resources section (Forbidden Fruit only has 1 location now, not 3,) but it was only a few minor things.
After reading The Ultimate Guide to Sexual Fantasy, I’m confident that you’ll feel like the world is your sexual oyster, ripe and ready for you to devour it! I recommend it to anyone who wants to strengthen their sex life–Violet Blue makes learning about all of the possibilities for fantasy fueled sex accessible and exciting.
“Fantasies are your own private, personal sex toys. They send a direct current buzzing from your brain down to your groin. The right sexual fantasy, running in your head like your own private movie, can turn you on like a switch. When you know what works for you, your own vivid imagination can bring you to dizzying heights of arousal–and take you over the orgasmic edge.” — Violet Blue, The Ultimate Guide to Sexual Fantasy
Jun 25, 2014
Although I constantly have new vibrators to test out for reviews, I still always use my all-time favorite toy. Always. Because even though I like other vibes, so far nothing has ever compared to the easy, powerful orgasms I get from the Hitachi1 Nothing.
Enter: The Eroscillator
Since I got the Eroscillator (Top Deluxe Ultimate Combo) about a month ago, I’ve neglected my Hitachi. I’ve only used it a few times for comparison. Sure, I’ve been using the Eroscillator a lot and trying out its various attachments for review purposes…but it also satisfies me just as much as the Hitachi…if not more. Yes, you heard me right. I’ve finally found a vibe that rivals my beloved Hitachi.
So what is this amazing machine?
The Eroscillator is essentially just a plug-in, 3 speed vibrator that comes with attachments for different sensations. But it’s so much more than that–it’s an orgasm beast machine. Unlike other vibrators, the Eroscillator moves back and forth at 3600 oscillations per minute. And about those orgasms…holy fuck, y’all, they’re intense.
As cliché as it may sound, the Eroscillator brings me “waves” of pleasure. While the Hitachi pounds orgasms out of me, the Eroscillator seems to pull them out from deep inside. Or it rubs them out. It’s hard to articulate. The Eroscillator makes me come so hard that I think I won’t be able to again, but then I do. It turns into a challenge called how many times can I get off, and I always win. It leaves me sweaty, tired, giddy, and satisfied–I often can’t move for at least a few minutes afterwards, and I almost always need immediate munchies to regain my strength.
Now that I’ve introduced you to the best part of the Eroscillator (ahem, the orgasms!), let’s talk about how it works. The Eroscillator’s body is 8″ long and is made of hard plastic with ribbing for easy gripping, and they snap on & off easily. It’s 3 power settings are controlled by sliding the Eroscillator nameplate up and down, and as you do, the power setting you’re on (1, 2, or 3) is displayed. The Eroscillator weighs 8oz (which is light for a wand), and its cord is a generous 12ft, so it’s easy to hold and position even with a partner. Although I can orgasm using it over my panties, I prefer to use it (with lube) for direct clitoral stimulation.
I try not to compare all of my vibes to the Hitachi, since it’s kind of its own animal, but since the Eroscillator is also a powerful plug-in vibe I can’t help but compare them. Logistically speaking the Eroscillator has a lot of advantages over the Hitachi–its cord is twice as long, it’s much quieter and lighter, and it features 3 increasing power levels instead of 2. Although it’s not as powerful as the Hitachi, it can provide equally intense orgasms, so it’s perfect for people who want intense stimulation without the jack-hammer strength of the Hitachi. The Eroscillator is quite pricey though comparatively.
From reading other Eroscillator reviews, I know that preferences for attachments vary wildly, but here’s an overview, in order from my favorite to least favorite. They’re all made of TPR except the Soft Finger, which is made of silicone elastomer. Since they’re porous, they can’t be sterilized or safety shared with non-fluid-bonded partners, which is disappointing.
1- The Ultra Soft Finger Tip (Aka, the “Marshmallow”)- My favorite attachment by far. I love the broad, soft stimulation it provides. It does dampen the vibration the most out of all of the attachments, but it’s still very powerful.
2- G-Point- The convex side is meant for g-spot stimulation, but my g-spot prefers girth & pressure to vibration, so I don’t like using it internally. The concave side is supposed to be for clitoral stimulation. I actually prefer the convex side, clitorally.
3-Golden Spoon- This one is great for labia stimulation, and I also enjoy either side clitorally.
4-The Seven Pearls of the Orient- This one is supposedly for vaginal or anal penetration, but I don’t recommend using it anally since it could possibly dislodge from the base & become stuck in the rectum. It doesn’t do much for me vaginally, but it’s great for pinpoint clitoral vibration.
5-The French Legionnaire’s Moustache- Bringing hipster to a whole new level. I like the way it feels with the head part on my clit with the mustache tickling my labia. I only like this one at the lower 2 speeds; with the 3rd the bristles irritate me. Prepare for messiness, because the mustache is a lube sprinkler.
6- Ball & Cup Heads- The concave side is designed for clitoral stimulation, and the convex side “might help you to exercise your vagina.2” Both sides tend to annoy my clit (I prefer the other rounder, smoother attachments.)
7-Grapes & Cockscomb Heads- My least favorite attachment. The texture of the grapes irritates my clit to the point that it’s almost painful, and the comb part does slide down the sides of my labia nicely which is good for teasing, but I can’t come unless I press the comb sideways onto my clit, which takes some finagling and is frustrating.
As much as I adore my new Eroscillator, it does have some cons, namely the steep price. The cheapest version of the Top Deluxe with Extra Power (what I have) is $195, and that doesn’t include my fave attachment, the Soft Finger. For $230 you can get it with the Soft Finger, but you don’t get my 2nd fave attachment, the G Point. For the full package with all of the attachments, it’s $255. And although I do think the orgasms are worth it, I’m very disappointed that the attachments are TPR and not silicone, especially considering the price. I also wish it came with a nicer case (it includes a plain plastic “storage bag” that’s unimpressive.) Oh, and it also looks like an electric toothbrush and could definitely use an update in the design department, though I really could care less when it’s delivering me foundation shattering orgasms.
Foundation shattering orgasms
In Epiphora’s review of the Eroscillator, she says “Everyone with a clitoris should own the Eroscillator. Hell, everyone with a soul should own it,” and I fully agree.
If you’re looking for deep vibration and orgasms, you’ll love the Eroscillator. If you love your Hitachi & think nothing else will compare, I dare you to try it. If you have yet to find a vibe that really wows you, Eroscillator is probably the answer. And in the unlikely event that you don’t like the Eroscillator, you can get a refund within 30 days (it’s also warranty protected for a year.)
As far as which one to get, I’ve only tried the Top Deluxe with extra power, so I can’t say how much power you’re losing if you get the original, but honestly I wouldn’t want to lose any of its intensity. If you’re sensitive however, you could go for the original.
In case you haven’t noticed, I am heels over head in love with my new Eroscillator. So much so, that I almost cried when I thought it wasn’t working anymore (the A/C adapter just wasn’t inserted all the way, thank GOB.) I’m not going to shun my original favorite though. Comparing the two is kind of like trying to compare cheesecake and pie–they’re both delicious, and I don’t want to live in a world without either one.
*Thanks to the folks at Eroscillator.com for sending me this amazing orgasm beast machine to review!*