Category Archives: Writing

Review: Njoy Pure Plug (Large)

pennysblog_pureplug1I’m tempted to let this tweet stand for itself as my review…but since not everyone compares butt plugs to pizza, let’s talk about why the Njoy Pure Plugs rock.

Made of medical grade stainless steel that’s hand polished to a gorgeous shine, the Pure Plugs are created by Njoy, aka makers of the Pure Wand (one of my all time fave g-spotting dildos.)

The Pure Plugs come in three sizes,1 and I’m glad I got a Large because it’s actually not that big compared to some of my other plugs, and I love the sensation as it stretches my sphincter around its thickest part2, right before my butt sucks it in greedily. Since it’s so smooth, the Pure Plug is easy to insert with a little bit of lube and warm up and/or a (clit) vibe.

Even in hot Texas weather, the Pure Plug always seems to be cold, as if by some spell, and it feels exquisite going in. Though it’s not a huge toy, the Pure Plug’s hard, heavy steel feels incredibly intense as my muscles squeeze around it, but it’s still very comfortable, and its base rests nonchalantly between butt checks.

pennysblog_pureplug2When I want to have anal sex and get my butt in the mood, I warm up with Pure Plug.  When I had my first DP threesome experience, I whispered to Jake, go get me the Pure Plug. When my vagina is being moody, but I still want super intense orgasms, I use Pure Plug paired with a clitoral vibe.

I also enjoy the feeling of weight and fullness when wearing it during vaginal penetration, and it’s especially intense in doggy style, as my partner’s hips nudge on it with every thrust.

Other reasons the Pure Plug rocks: it’s super easy to clean/doesn’t retain butt smells3, you can use silicone lube with it4, you can use it for temperature play or predicament bondage5, and it’s perfect for taking selfies in.

Those of you who read my blog regularly are probably thinking, but what about Romp?! Don’t worry, my butt is non-monogamous. I don’t use Romp during vaginal penetration anymore (because both my best friend & a fellow blogger have had experiences with it getting sucked into their butts during sex), but Romp still has Pure Plug beat for casual wear. I’m not a big fan of wearing the Pure Plug while walking around/doing normal activities (though you definitely can if you want) because I find its weight distracting–I prefer it in purely sexual contexts.

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Pure Plug, Eleven, & Pure Wand

The Pure Plug is butt magic. It’s smooth, heavy, and arousing.  It calls out to me in the night, communicating on some frequency only butts can understand. If you have a butt and you enjoy putting things in it, you need a Pure Plug in your life, like yesterday!

Next up on my Njoy wishlist: The Eleven, of course6. Most of my blogger friends are obsessed with it, and it’s already seduced me in photos.  Also, Pure Plug 2.0 because I love a challenge. And let’s be honest, I want the Pure Plug in Medium for comparison purposes, and the Pure Plug Small to wear as a necklace (as suggested by Greg, the genius of Njoy, when I met him recently at Woodhull.)

Thanks so much to SheVibe for sending me the Pure Plug in exchange for an honest review!


  1. Small: 2.25″ long/1″ wide, Medium: 2.5″ long/1.25″ wide, & Large:2.75″ long/1.5″ wide 

  2. 1.5″ 

  3. like silicone can without a bleach cleaning 

  4. unlike with silicone toys 

  5. I’ve seen pics of this on Jade’s blog, but sadly it’s not up anymore 

  6. It was in my 15 Toys I Want to Try in 2015 list. 

5 Reasons Why Woodhull Was an Amazing Experience

I had such an amazing experience at the Woodhull Sexual Freedom Summit, put on by the incredible Woodhull Sexual Freedom Alliance. Thanks so much to Tantus and Njoy for the blogger scholarship that helped me get there and to Bex for graciously allowing me to stay with her and drive to the conference together, and for taking me to the beach, helping me acquire bacon, and watching Supernatural with me, among other things.

1. The Sessions Were Informative, Moving, and Motivating

The sessions at Woodhull were a perfect blend of vital information, important stories, inspiring speakers, and calls to action.

The first one I attended was The How’s and Why’s of Sex Education in Blogging, Retail, and Manufacturing, where we heard from two of the first champions for safe sex toys in the industry, Jennifer Pritchett from Smitten Kitten and Metis Black from Tantus, as well as leading sex toy safety blogger Dangerous Lilly and blogger Caitlin Murphy. The industry has come a long way thanks to these amazing folks, but we still have a lot of work to do. Many people are still unknowingly buying toxic toys that can potentially leave them with infections or chemical burns. Most people still aren’t getting pleasure based (if any) accurate sex education.

There were so many important points made during the session, but the most memorable moment for me was listening to Jennifer talk about a married couple they helped in the store. The wife was unable to orgasm, and they’d seen therapists for decades trying to change that, and until then, somehow no one had thought to ask if she knew where her clitoris is.  The second session I attended on Friday was The Monster Under the Bed: Starting the Conversation About Sex and Depression. JoEllen Notte, Crista Anne, and Stephen Biggs talked about stereotypes surrounding depression and sex, the lack of education from healthcare professionals on the sexual side-effects of medication, the importance of feeling pleasure during depression, and more. JoEllen also shared some of the things she’s learned during her research for her upcoming book on sex and depression, which I can’t wait to read when it comes out. It was an emotional and oh-so-important session. 

The most information packed session was definitely Lube! An In-Depth Look at Personal Lubricants–we were all in awe of Sarah‘s incredible lube research and knowledge. Basically, we learned that most water based lubes that are widely available at drugstores are hyper-osomtic and can cause irritation and increase your risk of infections and STIs. If you want to learn more, check out Piph’s notes. The good news from this session was that Sliquid (the lube I use) is one of the few that is safe for most people’s genitals.

On Saturday, I wasn’t sure which sessions I’d go to, but I wandered in to Punishing Pleasure: Legal Updates from the Trenches of Adult Entertainment, and I’m glad I did because the information about adult entertainment and censorship was really interesting. First Amendment Attorneys Lawrence Walters and Luke Lirot talked about how vague “obscenity” charges are and how modern censorship politics link erotica with human trafficking to create hysteria.

The second session I went to on Saturday was Yes, All Genders: How to Normalize and Include Trans Bodies with Alex Morgan and Monique Darling. There was a lot of important discussion and information, and the biggest take away for me was to stop making assumptions about people. Don’t assume someone’s gender or whether they’re cis or trans based on their appearance.  Don’t assume that everyone will fit into the binary and make space for those who don’t. Don’t assume people you’re talking to can’t handle inclusive discussions–challenge your audience, peers and friends. It’s all easier said than done, and I know for me it’s easier in sex positive spaces than in the “real world” but it’s important to constantly challenge ourselves to do better.

The last session I went to was Let’s Talk About Senior Sex by the amazing Joan Price. As was the case last time I attended one of her sessions, many of the things she talked about applies to people of all ages, though her focus is on senior sex. She covered a range of topics from how sexuality changes as we age to specific sex toy needs for seniors to the importance of safe sex and how to put a condom on a soft penis with your mouth (no more, I can’t get hard with a condom on excuse!) We’re all hoping she’ll do a post about that soon. Oh, and I won’t go into it too much because I’m sure Epiphora will write about it, but someone tried to mansplain vibrators to a room full of sex bloggers. Nope.

2. Bloggers Were Welcomed and Appreciated

 

It’s easy to feel lost in a huge conference, but Ricci Levy encouraged bloggers to attend, thanked us for coming, and was so welcoming and supportive, we were blown away. Tantus also sponsored and set up a blogger lounge where we could gather, feel safe, and get our coffee fix, which made all the difference. The attitude from all of the retailers I came in contact with, including the wonderful folks from SheVibe, Smitten Kitten, and Tantus, was that review feedback is necessary and helpful, that negative reviews are just as important as positive ones, and that the Blog Squad is mighty and valued in the industry.

3. I Met Big Name People (and It Wasn’t a Big Deal)

I got to have lunch and spend some time with the fabulous Sandra and Thor from SheVibe. I listened to Metis tell industry stories. Ricci Levy offered a phone number in case we needed anything. Peyton helped us figure out the espresso machine and was so sweet and easy to talk to. I met the genius behind Njoy. Smitten Kitten picked me up some gluten free snacks from a nearby Whole Foods.  Buck Angel sat and listened to the Yes All Genders panel and danced with us during the gala. I didn’t actually get a chance to talk to Nina Hartley, but I listened to her talk about why she got into porn during BedPost Confessions (and she retweeted me a couple of times, *squee*.) I never felt like I couldn’t talk to or approach someone–everyone I encountered was friendly and welcoming.

4. Internet Friends Became Real Life Friends

No conference would be complete without bonding time, and I was so glad I got to see close blogger friends like Bex, Epiphora, and Reenie from Dildo Holiday as well as meet others, some of which I’d known for years on the Internet and some new.

Lilly had warned that she might be shy or hard to approach but that wasn’t actually the case at all–she was super easy to talk to and was equal parts passionate and silly. Since Caitlin was staying with Bex as well, I got to spend extra time with them, and they’re really kind and fun, not to mention fabulously femme–one night they cooked for Bex and I in a pin up dress *swoon.* Artemisia was as awesome as I imagined– she’s gorgeous, sweet, and of course had ALL the glitter nail polish, and I had a lot of fun geeking out over photography with her.

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Lunabelle’s dildos

One of the things Lunabelle is known for is her huge, eclectic collection of unique dildos, and I must say I was not disappointed with the sampling of literally 50 dildos she brought along to show us–seriously, she’s my dildo hero, and she’s also really down to earth and cool.) Also, she brought a traveling bar so…she’s pretty much winning at life.

Mandi was just as sweet, cute, and smart as I thought she’d be, and as she mentioned in her post about Woodhull, we bonded over books and cats. I really wish we (and all of blog squad) lived closer because I would definitely call her to hang out on the regular. Dizzy was also really nice and easy going, and I’m glad I got to have drinks with her and the rest of the Blog Squad Thursday night. Speaking of drinks, when her, Lunabelle, and Lena, a new (and super cute) blogger showed up at the hotel pool with some strong “coffee” (which I naively took a sip of thinking was actually coffee), I thought, yep, these people know how to party.

Some other bloggers I got to meet were Crista (who gives awesome hugs and is an overall bad-ass), Mary and Harry Contrary (Texas peeps, woot!), and Beck (who I wish I had more time to bond over Buffy with.) If I’m forgetting anyone I apologize–it was a whirlwind of smiling sex positive faces!

5. Blog Squad Unite: Magic Happens When Sex Bloggers Gather

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One of the most fun parts of conferences for me is getting the opportunity to be with my peeps–there’s a magic that only happens when I’m with my sex blogger friends. Like Epiphora doing an impromptu photo-shoot of Bex and I wearing nothing but Joque harnesses and Vixen dildos while jumping on the bed. Like it being no big deal to shoot naked self portraits in Bex’s Eleven. Like getting sharpie tattoos on my butt by the babely Artemisia, and Reenie asking if she can send dildo dick pics. Like standing up to a mansplainer. Like snickering in unison at the mention of “sil-a-gel.” Like singing our lungs out to this song and chuckling as we passed a school called Poly Prep. Like talking about vagina feelings, comparing butt plugs to pizza, and using dildos as telescopes. Like getting the best hugs and feeling inspired by the amazing people you’re lucky enough to be friends with. I miss all of y’all so much already!

Want to read even more about Woodhull? Check out the event from LillyMandiDizzy, LunabelleDeAnn, LenaBeck, and Ruby‘s point of views.

Breaking a Sweat

Sexy thoughts are far from my mind as I sip my “swamp juice”—a brownish concoction of fruit, protein, flax meal, & chia seeds. But Jake’s hands—brushing my bare neck, and then lower, to my damp sports bra, reel me in.

He just got back from the gym while I worked out at home, and we’re both hot and disheveled, both feeling strong and endorphin-rush happy.

I close my eyes as he awakens my nipples through the thin pink fabric, his muscular frame pressed against me from behind.

“I love the way you look after working out, sweaty and flushed,” he says.

He turns me around, and then a soft, slow kiss—my body is tired from sweating and lifting, and suddenly, a prize.

He draws me towards the bedroom, guiding me as I walk backwards, and we stay lip-locked on the way. One of my favorite things about working out at home is that I can do it in underwear and a sports bra—and they’re both off quickly.

“I want to lick your sweaty pussy,” he says.

My bush is soft and wet, and he dives right in, immersing himself in my juices. I relax into the bed, closing my eyes, focusing on the feeling of his tongue moving slowly across my vulva. His strong arms grip my legs.

“Mmm, that feels good baby.”

He dips a finger in, inviting my g-spot to join in on the pleasure—“yes.”

My arousal builds, blood rushing to my labia and clit. I get kind of zen—I can picture my g-spot, visualize it swelling and filling.

My orgasm already seems within reach, but I’m not ready yet.

“I want some cock now,” I say, wiggling out from beneath his mouth, and within seconds I swallow him. He groans—that groan I love so much, the one I’ve heard so many times over our almost 7 years together.

I look up into his eyes as I suck up and down, my tongue on his frenulum, my hands on his balls. I know eye contact makes him crazy.

“You’re the queen of blow jobs,” he says, smiling.

“Mmm hmm”—I answer, as much as I can with a mouth full of cock.

He touches my hair.

I know he means it–he’s had his share of blowjobs. Sometimes he likes to show me off—give other men a taste of my lips, my skills. I love that.

“I want to taste your pussy again,” he says.

This is common for us—we both want to taste each other, we both get pleasure out of giving—so it’s a wonderful back and forth of mouths to genitals. Sometimes that’s all we do—oral is amazing sex on its own.

But today I want to get fucked.

We stop for a quick break so I can pee—a necessary thing for post workout, post water guzzling sex.

I come back to find he’s laid out the throe and lubed up his cock, stroking it as he waits.

Perfect.

His thoughtfulness and anticipation of my needs turns me on just as much as his hard thighs, his vibrant tattoos, his gorgeous, long curly hair, and his big, strong, hands.

Those hands are soon on my ass as I get on all fours in front of him.

“I love your big ass,” he says.

I turn my head, looking back at him, looking at my ass.

“And I love how strong your pussy smells right now.”

“Me too,” I say.

It’s true. The whole room smells like me. My huge bush holds my scent well—even more so after being intensely physical. I love the smell of cock too, but nothing compares to the smell of vulva, mine or others. It’s so. Fucking. Good.

He slides inside of me.

The next few minutes are a blur of thrusts, gasps, and wet noises, and then he flips me over.

My clit aches to be touched.

Now I’m facing him—my eyes lock with his.

“Go slow baby, it feels so intense,” I say.

He does as I ask, his cock nudging gently at my g-spot as he grips my open thighs.

It’s not long before I’m gasping “faster,” but now he’s enjoying the tease.

My fingers circle my clit, his thrusts quicken, but just as I feel my orgasm is close again, he slows.

I can tell this orgasm will be blended—my clit throbs, hard with blood, and my g-spot swells with his teasing. Every time he senses I’m close, he pulls back.

His grin tells me he knows exactly what he’s doing.

Sweat drips across his chest—he’s working so hard for me.

I look into his eyes, desperate. I can’t wait much longer.

He thrusts faster and doesn’t slow down this time.

I’ve come to the point where I can’t really think, and my noises and moans are involuntary and increasingly louder.

“Fuck, fuck fuckkk,” I moan, my face surely scrunched up in a weird, orgasm-drawn expression.

He pounds into me as I stroke my clit, furiously now—I’m caught up in an orgasm that doesn’t stop, my cunt squeezing his cock.

“Fuck baby I’m gonna come”—his words come out, frantic.

I ride my orgasm, gasping “yes,” as he pulls out, his come sprinkling my bush.

“That felt so fucking good,” I say, giggling in post orgasm bliss.

We’re both soaked.

“Thank goddess for throes,” I say.

“And showers,” he says.

wickedwed

Review: Lovehoney Crotchless Cutout Lace Back Panties

pennysblog_lovehoneycrotchlesspantiesI love the way panties with sheer backs look, so when the new Lovehoney lingerie line came out, the Crotchless Cutout Lace Back Panties caught my eye.

I wouldn’t have chosen a crotchless style if given the option–I like cute panties because they’re like wrapping paper for my vulva, something pretty to conceal and tease, so what’s the point of having an open crotch when I could just take them off…or be naked? But all of the Lovehoney panties were crotchless when they first came out, so I figured I’d give them a shot.

The Lovehoney panties are made of black spandex, with an opaque front, lacy butt panel, ruffle detail, and a crotch hole cut out. When I wear them, my vaginal opening and a little bit of my long inner labia is exposed, but the rest of my vulva is covered. This translates to them not being that comfortable to wear while out and about because my labia catches on the hole as I walk.

What these panties are great for though, is teasing and sex. I love the extra-cheekiness of the lace cut out, and my partner loves having my vulva accessible even with the panties on. They normally cover my clit, but Jake was able to gain clit access and give me oral while wearing them by pulling them up a bit.

pennysblog_lovehoneycrotchlesspanties2The first thing I wondered when I got the panties was, can you actually have penetrative sex while wearing them? And the answer for me, is yes, yes you can! They worked for oral, fingering, and we even tried them once for P-I-V sex, and it actually felt really good to be a little constricted by the panties, with subtle pressure on my outer labia. Jake could feel them rubbing a little in certain positions, but not so much that we bothered to take them off. The crotch hole was a little stretched out after but not ruined.

The biggest complaint I have about these panties is the (lack of) sizing options. When they first came out, there were only two options: Small/Medium, which claims to fit dress size 6-8, and Medium/Large, which claims to fit dress size 10-12. I wasn’t sure which I should go with, since I wear medium panties, but I had a feeling they would run small, so I chose M/L.

I was right, they do run small, which isn’t really a surprise considering the S/M fits well on the Lovehoney model, who they say is a size 4 with 35″ hips. So why does it say they’ll fit a size 6-8? They stretch a little, but not that much. Since I received mine, Lovehoney has added another larger size: L/XL. But they run small and still don’t offer anything above “L/XL”, so that means the sizing options here are very limited, and that’s a shame.

Overall, I’ve enjoyed wearing the Lovehoney Crotchless Cutout panties–I just wish they’d add more size options so more people could enjoy them.

The Lovehoney Crotchless Cutout Lace Back Panties are available at Lovehoney US & Lovehoney UK. Right now there’s also a 3 for $25 Sexy Panties Deal!

Thanks, Lovehoney!

Review: Minna Ola

pennysblog_minnaolaOla was the first of Minna’s vibrators with squeeze technology. You may remember from my review of Minna’s second vibrator, the Limon, the basic idea behind it–you control the toy’s vibration strength by how hard you squeeze, which allows you to create your own vibration patterns.

Limon and Ola are similar–they’re both silicone, rechargeable, and feature customizable vibration–the main difference is their shape–Limon is a small, round vibrator that resembles a lemon, and Ola features a squeeze-pad handle and a hard, insertable shaft1. I’m not a big fan of internal vibration, but I requested Ola to review for clitoral use because one of my main complaints with Limon is that it’s difficult to hold.

In that respect, Ola is better–it’s easier to hold and squeeze, so it’s much easier to use paired with dildos than the Limon, which is a big win. I enjoy creating my own teasing patterns–I tend to start with low vibration, gradually increase it, and then pull back right as I feel super turned on, and then lock that pattern and use it to tease myself until I come–I’ve had some pretty awesome orgasms like that because my arousal builds gradually.

The thing about Ola’s squeeze technology though (and Limon’s) is that I have to put some effort and thought into creating the pattern before I can enjoy it. I have to make sure I’m on the right setting to record the pattern (Record Mode), then create it, and then press the lock button so that it saves the pattern (Lock Mode), and the slightest touch of the pad between recording and locking can ruin everything. I want to relax and orgasm with as little effort as possible, so this whole process is pain. pennysblog_minnaola2It would be awesome if Ola allowed you to save vibration patterns, but sadly, that’s not a feature.

As cool as the customizable vibration patterns are, Ola and Limon would also be SO much better if they had steady vibration settings. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve gotten a hand cramp from trying to squeeze it as hard as possible when my orgasm is close. Sure, you can hack it and create a steady pattern, but I never think of that ahead of time.

Ola has a good range of vibration, from a light tickle to moderately strong–it’s a little less powerful than Mona. Using Ola’s vibration patterns to build arousal can make me come–but I’m greedy. I don’t just want one orgasm, I want 2 or 3. And when I’ve had one orgasm with teasing, I often end up squeezing Ola as hard as possible because I want to have another orgasm with steady vibration. And stripped of its fancy patterns, my clit just wishes Ola was stronger and rumblier.

Although my g-spot doesn’t usually like vibration, I tried Ola vaginally anyways because I’m still on the lookout for a vibe that my g-spot will love, and I could potentially enjoy Ola’s shape. But it just wasn’t meant to be–Ola provides the best stimulation flipped so that the shaft curves up against my g-spot, but using it that way means the squeeze pad/handle is pointed away from me at an awkward angle, which makes it difficult to thrust. And with so many other amazing g-spot toys, why bother?

So, should you get Ola? If you’re really intrigued by the idea of creating your own vibration patterns, don’t need a ton of power, and don’t necessarily need steady vibration, then yes. I recommend it over Limon because it’s easier to hold, and there’s at least potential for internal stimulation.

Minna is definitely on to something with their squeeze technology, and I wish I could wholeheartedly recommend Ola. With some improvements–steady vibration settings, the ability to save vibration patterns, and stronger and rumblier vibration, I bet it could hang along with some of the best vibrators out there.

Ola is available at SheVibe or Early to Bed!

Thanks, Minna!


  1. it’s ~5″ long, with a 1.5″ diameter 

Glass dildo dreams come true

I already told y’all a little about how we got to make our own glass dildos at Dildo Holiday, but I also want to share some of the behind the scenes photos.

First, we checked out where the magic happens, exploring the studio and looking at various glass pieces.

pennysblog_makingglassdildos_1pennysblog_makingglassdildos_2pennysblog_makingglassdildos_3Piph went first–Kelly helped her make a swirly textured, curved turquoise dildo.

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Piph’s came out a little smaller than she wanted, so I asked Kelly to make mine bigger (it came out WAY bigger.) I chose orange and turquoise and wanted a curved dildo with two bulbous ends and some texture.

All of the photos of me/my dildo were captured by Kate.

katesglassphotos (3)katesglassphotos (6)katesglassphotos (4)katesglassphotos (2)I also captured some shots of Bex, Aerie, & Kate making their pieces. pennysblog_makingglassdildos_7 pennysblog_makingglassdildos_8Otto helped Aerie make their creation and did an awesome job of explaining the process.pennysblog_makingglassdildos_9Kate created a flower pattern in her dildo–fancy!pennysblog_makingglassdildos_10pennysblog_makingglassdildos_11Behold, the birth of seven new glass dildo beauties into the world!

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1- Reenie 2- Aerie 3-Girly Juice 4- Me 5- Kate 6- Bex 7- Epiphora

We had a guessing game on social media to see if anyone could guess them all right. Some people guessed a few right, and Panda got them all! My partner also guessed mine right, and so did a friend of mine. My partner said he guessed based on the colors and shape, and my friend said he knew because “it kinda looks like the blue one that’s your favorite.” I’m pretty sure the fact that my friends know my taste in dildos means I’ve succeeded in life.

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Thanks so much to our fabulous sponsors Tantus & We-Vibe–our glass dildo dreams wouldn’t have come true without you!

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*Check out Girly Juice’s post to read more about the glass making process!

10 of my favorite parts of Dildo Holiday

What was Dildo Holiday, you might ask? It was an epic joining of 7 sex bloggers (Epiphora, Aerie, Bex, Kate, Reenie, Girly Juice, & I) in a fabulous place on the coast of Oregon called Dildo Manor. We came together to share knowledge, dildos, and laughs, and we left with countless memories (and more dildos.) Since it would be nearly impossible for me to recount all of the fabulous moments, here are 10 of my favorite things from the trip.

1. Devil’s Point

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Photo by Aerie

I’ve been to the strip club plenty of times, but never with a group of babes. We got there early and sat up front and watched beautiful tattooed dancers do amazing things with their bodies, and I got a private dance from a dancer named Pixie who looked like a combination of Jennifer Lawrence and Stoya. It was our first night all together, and we bonded over drinks and vulvae. Oh, and some dudes called us “rich girls” because how dare we sit up front and capture the attention of the dancers by tipping an appropriate amount. Move along, bro.

2. Cherub of Shame

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Cherub of Shame trying to stop Piph from getting her Hitachi

If you were following the #dildoholiday hashtag, you probably noticed a creepy baby/angel/mermaid statue sucking its thumb called Cherub of Shame. Long story short, we noticed it was watching us when we first arrived at Dildo Manor, and then it kept appearing in random places throughout the house, as if it were alive. Piph first noticed it disapproved of our shenanigans when it tried to block her from going upstairs to grab her Hitachi during porn night, and it went downhill from there. The cherub appeared in the fridge, on the toilet, tucked in Kate’s bed, staring at us eerily from the bathroom, always watching, judging. I bet it misses us heathens though.

3. Porn Night

How can you go wrong watching an amazing selection of indie porn curated by Kate, surrounded by babely sex bloggers? We watched hot porn that didn’t show any genitals, porn with great communication, and porn with people getting fucked by doll’s legs. We all moaned in unison when Wolf Hudson and Danny Wylde kissed in My Own Master, we cheered on Jiz Lee’s rimming skills during Justify My Jiz, and we were amazed/inspired by the fact that Annie Sprinkle was squirting before any of us were even born. Oh, and we cuddled/live tweeted/had casual orgasms throughout, no big deal.

4. The Epic Sex

The first night in Dildo Manor, Epiphora let me borrow her Hitachi rechargeable during porn night. Then we kissed and went to my room, and I fingered her until the sun came up and my fingers were pruny, and she was so soft and smelled amazing and made the sexiest sounds, and it was unforgettable. Throughout Dildo Holiday, I was both a bit of an exhibitionist and a voyeur, I squirted alongside Bex (sharing porn like a textbook, like you do), I got spanked, and I was part of an epic group masturbation session during which I tried/fell in love with Aerie’s G Spoon and Kate’s glass dildo, Lil Bloomer.

5. Making our own glass dildos

Me making my glass dildo! Photo by Kate Sinclaire

Me making my glass dildo! Photo by Kate Sinclaire

Epiphora, Aerie, & Bex told us there would be a super secret surprise. They warned us that it might get hot and to wear closed toed shoes. Are we going hiking? On a boat? How is this dildo related? We were hella confused. But it all made sense when we pulled up into a parking lot, and I spotted a sign that read “Blow Your Own Glass.”

We each decided on colors and general shapes, and the artists did their best to create what we had in mind. Each of our dildos is unique to our preferences, but there was a common theme–more curve! I love the color and shape of mine…but it’s a little bigger (ok a lot bit bigger) than I intended, and I have yet to actually get it to fit in my vagina (but Kate did! So there’s hope.) We had a guessing game going on social media as to whose was whose…and Dildo Psychic Panda Sauce actually got them all right! Also, my partner/a dude friend of mine both guessed mine correctly–I was super impressed!

See more of my glass dildo making photos in this post!

The results: gorgeous glass dildos!

The results: gorgeous glass dildos!

A huge thanks to our sponsors Tantus & We-Vibe–we wouldn’t have been able to do it without them!  

6. Teaching the photography workshop  

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Photo of me by Kate Sinclaire

I don’t think I’d ever actually been excited about a PowerPoint until I made one for the how to take beautiful dildo photos workshop that Kate & I hosted. I’d also never really taught others about photography…and I realized I really enjoy it–I was so proud when Reenie captured a gorgeously composed shot, and when I showed Piph the magic of Lightroom. After the workshop, everyone suggested I offer a Photography for Sex Bloggers course, so stay tuned for details on that! 

7. The Dildos  

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Dildo Holiday meeting, captured by Epiphora

Obviously it wouldn’t have been Dildo Holiday without the dildos. Dildos, everywhere. Dildos crowding tables during meetings. Dildos stuffed in toy bags. Dildos born of fire. Dildo tattoos. Dildo photos. Dildos with cheese. Dildos soaking in bleach solution, waiting to be used again. Dildos in sinks. In closets. In our epic goodie bags. In porn. In vaginas.

8. Telephone Pictionary- Sex Blogger Edition pennysblog_telephone_pictionaryWhen sex bloggers get together and play telephone pictionary (aka Eat Poop You Cat), ridiculous things happen. Somehow “double penetration” becomes “very confused genital person whose parts have been replaced with a coat hanger” and “sharing porn like sharing a textbook” turns into “pregnant people looking at a farmer’s butt while the farmer looks at a painting of a cat wearing a butt plug.” We laughed until we cried (and snorted.)

9. Pizza+Sybian+50 Shades of Grey

What did we do on the last day that everyone was together in Portland? We ordered a ridiculous amount of pizza, curled up together in Piph’s basement, watched mocked 50 Shades of Grey, and rode the infamous Sybian, of course–Girly Juice even managed to do all 3 simultaneously. As if it could get any better, Piph’s adorable cat Chowder did a round of lap-sitting while we watched.

A huge thanks to SheVibe, our generous food sponsor!

10. The People

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Epic matching sex toys/tattoos photo, captured by Kate

I don’t think I’ve ever clicked with a group of people as quickly and effortlessly as I did with the Dildo Holiday peeps. Even though I’d only met half of them IRL, it seemed like we’d all been friends for years. When I was with my peeps, it was completely normal to live tweet masturbation sessions, shoot noodzhang out without pants, compare the curliness of our pubes, toast to DPs, and to share lube and sex toys (after discussing STI status/cleaning preferences, of course.) Girly Juice goes into it more in her post, but the sex positive and body positive vibes were nothing short of amazing.

Want to hear even more about Dildo Holiday? Check out Epiphora’s postStorify, Girly Juice’s posts, & Kate’s posts!

Thanks so much to all of the Dildo Holiday sponsors: Tantus, We-Vibe, SheVibe, Early to Bed, Smitten Kitten,  & Tool Shed Toys— y’all are the best!

Review: L’amourose Rosa Rouge

pennysblog_rosarougeThe L’amourose Rosa Rouge is a swanky vibrator, with its jewel motif, soft silicone, and sleek design and packaging. If Gatsby hosted orgies, Rosas would be as abundant as champagne and lacy panties. The Rosa Rouge arouses me before I even turn on its vibration, and I’m not just talking about its drool worthy aesthetic.

What is this sorcery?

The Rosa Rogue isn’t just a vibrator… it’s a heating vibrator. It kind of feels like I’m masturbating with hot lava, but in the best way. It’s like a little spa treatment for my clit. A clit sauna. A little private sunny island vacay for my vulva…with orgasms instead of Mai Tais.

Since there are so many vibrators on the market these days, companies are constantly trying to come up with novel features to keep people interested. There are vibes that are suppossed to act like fingers, vibes meant to mimic oral, vibes that look like aliens…and I’m all for variety, but often these toys are just gimmicky and would be better off with a more basic design.

But Rosa Rogue’s heating is definitely not a gimmick. Oh man, I love it. If I put it on my clit for the few minutes it takes to heat up to 104-107 degrees1, I get super aroused, and by the time it’s warmed up, my clit is ready to party, and its rumbly vibration is heavenly. It’s not quite as strong and rumbly as Tango, but it can still hang, even with die hard Tango fans.

Other things I love about Rosa: it’s quiet, rechargeable, waterproof, lockable for travel, and it comes with an 18 month warranty. The charger base also rocks–it’s super easy to use, and it’s obvious when it’s done charging.

So far I’ve mentioned that my clit loves Rosa’s heating and vibration. Specifically, the shaft’s vibration. But Rosa is also designed to be a dual stimulator–the shaft is curved for g-spot vibration and the base is meant for simultaneous clitoral stimulation…but Rosa doesn’t work for me that way.

Rosa’s shaft provides deep, rumbly vibrations (hell yes!), while the base’s vibrations are less powerful and buzzier (sad face.) So when I insert Rosa’s shaft and use it as intended, my clit is underwhelmed by the base’s weaker vibration. My g-spot gets all of the strong rumblies, but my g-spot doesn’t need vibration, it needs pressure and/or thrusting, which Rosa’s flexible shaft can’t provide adequately… so neither my clit nor my g-spot are satisfied.

Other than the base not working out well for me and the flexible shaft, the main complaint I have with Rosa is the controls. Since they’re tiny and embedded in the silicone, they’re really difficult to see and control, and Rosa definitely needs an easy off button.2

So, the ultimate question here is, should you drop $240 on the Rosa Rouge? Is it worth it?

My g-spot says no. My wallet says hells no. But my clit says yassss!

For Rosa to be absolutely perfect and totally worth the hefty price tag for me, it would need to have a firmer shaft, easier to find buttons, and it would probably need to bring me coffee and/or pizza and cuddle with me while watching Buffy. But if you like powerful, rumbly vibrations, think you’ll enjoy the heating feature, and have an extra $240 lying around to invest in quality orgasms, Rosa is still a solid choice as is.

If you’re not interested in heating, there’s also the plain Rosa (available in emerald, cerise, and black) for $180. If both Rosa Rouge and plain Rosa are way out of your price range and you still want a strong petite vibe without warming, consider the Touch or Tango instead. If you’re looking for a dual stimulator, Rosa could work for you that way if you’re cool with rumbly, strong internal vibration, less powerful clitoral/external vibration and a flexible shaft.

Rosa Rouge is available at SheVibe, Lovehoney US, & Lovehoney UK!

Thanks for sending me the Rosa Rouge in exchange for an honest review, L’amourose!


  1. 40-42 degrees Celcius 

  2. You have to hold down the – for about 3 seconds to get it to turn off. 

e[lust] #67

e[lust] is a monthly digest of the best sex related writing on the Internet.

This month’s edition features my piece Yes, Squirting is Real (And it’s not pee) as a top post! My Wonderland image is also a featured sidebar photo.

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Photo courtesy of Rebels Notes

Welcome to Elust #67

The only place where the smartest and hottest sex bloggers are featured under one roof every month. Whether you’re looking for sex journalism, erotic writing, relationship advice or kinky discussions it’ll be here at Elust. Want to be included in Elust #68? Start with the rules, come back March 1st to submit something and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

For our UK readers, we would like to make a special request that you take a moment and fill out this petition to repeal the new censorship laws.

~ This Month’s Top Three Posts ~

Yes, Squirting is Real (And it’s not pee.)

These men make me SO angry

Still Kinky After All These Years

 

~ Featured Post (Molly’s Picks) ~

When It Rains
You want me to read what?

 

~ Readers Choice from Sexbytes ~

*You really should consider adding your popular posts here too*
Due to technical difficulties there is no Readers Choice selection this month

All blogs that have a submission in this edition must re-post this digest from tip-to-toe on their blogs within 7 days. Re-posting the photo is optional and the use of the “read more…” tag is allowable after this point. Thank you, and enjoy!

Continue reading »

Review: Vixen Creations Johnny

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When I got my first three VixSkin dildos (Buck, Johnny, & Tex), in my early notes for Johnny I wrote: Girthy. Delicious. Maybe my fave of the three. After months of using them all, Buck ended up winning the battle for my absolute favorite, but I still love Johnny as well.

Johnny is made of Vixen Creations’ addictive VixSkin dual density silicone, which features a firm core and a squishy, soft, skin-like outer layer. It feels incredibly realistic, and since it’s silicone, it’s hygienic and non-porous, unlike the majority of realistic dildos you see in a lot of sex toy stores that are often made of toxic materials (dildos you couldn’t pay me to touch now, much less put near my genitals.)

Johnny is similar to Buck in that it’s large (7″ long), uber-realistic, and quite girthy (1.75″) and veiny, but the most obvious difference is that Johnny has balls. Slightly lopsided, wrinkly, glorious balls. Johnny also has a more prominent curve, a longer, less pronounced head, and foreskin texture.

And let’s talk about that curve, shall we: it’s absolutely perfect for putting constant, fabulous pressure on my g-spot. Its head doesn’t protrude as much as Buck’s, so the g-spot stimulation feels different–it strokes more than it nudges or tugs.  Johnny’s girth stretches me in an exquisite way, and its foreskin’s texture feels great stimulating my vaginal opening and g-spot during thrusting. The combination of Johnny’s curve, girth, and texture usually ends with a squirty mess.

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Johnny’s balls are pretty epic, but they also make it a little harder to wield. I’m glad I have Johnny because I feel like my collection would be sadly lacking without a big, ballsy cock, but overall the balls don’t really add much for me during use.

Johnny is not a toy for when my vag is feeling finicky: I need to be in the zone. And I don’t go from zero to Johnny–I start with something smaller like Tex or Mustang, and move on to Johnny when my vag is like ok that feels good, now LET’S DO THIS! Its girth and texture also requires that I use quite a bit of lube, and every time I use Johnny I get a little closer to finally caving and getting a lube dispenser.

Another thing I should mention that’s come up since my Buck review–VixSkin is delicate and should be treated gently. Don’t ask me how it happened, but my Buck now has some light teeth marks around its head. They’re not so deep that it’s ruined, but I’m just saying…don’t let human (or pet) teeth get a hold of your VixSkin dildos.

If you’re looking for a curved, girthy, realistic dildo with hefty balls and some texture, you’ll probably love Johnny. If you don’t want balls, but you still want a girthy realistic dildo for intense g-spot stimulation, go with Buck. If you’re looking for a slimmer, shorter dildo, Mustang and Tex are both less girthy but still feature awesome g-spotting heads. Whatever you do, if you don’t have any VixSkin yet, get some! It’s a game changer.

Like all Vixen dildos, Johnny has a flared based (and balls!), so it’s safe for anal play and can be used in a harness. My Johnny is caramel, but it also comes in vanilla and chocolate.

Johnny is available at SheVibeLovehoney US, Lovehoney UK, or directly from Vixen.

What’s next on my Wishlist from Vixen Creations? Randy (Vixen’s girthiest dildo), which was in my 15 sex toys I want to try in 2015 list!

Thanks Vixen Creations for sending me Johnny in exchange for an honest review! (If you buy through my affiliate links I will make a small commission, but this does not affect my reviews, which are always fair and honest. Trust me, I will tell you when a toy sucks.)